I confess my envy.

Have you ever felt envy? I don't mean that moment when you are walking down the street and see someone eating an ice-cream and think "I wish I had one of those", but full-on 7 deadly sins envy? No? Then you have never tried to charter a Toastmasters International club.

Being part of an unchartered club has its downside. You can probably think of quite a few reasons why. The pressure to charter, the fear of looking foolish if you don't. Wondering if your PR efforts since the last meeting have made any difference, wondering how many favours you are going to end up owing people by the time you do make it.

All of these pale into insignificance when you go to speech contest or officer training and see all the other clubs' banners hanging on the wall. Imagine them, all lined up, their lustrous gold fabric shimmering, the bold TI logo proudly looking down onto the club name. And the ribbons...red, blue, green, purple with the club's biggest accomplishments spelt out in gold letters. And you wonder..."should I get an old pillowcase and a glitter pen and try to mock one up?"

Rules are rules; no charter, no banner. The only thing you can do is to try and find ways of coping. I do wonder how people have done it, what has got them through those terrible bannerless times? Counselling? Therapy? Medication? Physical restraints? All of the above? I suppose I will soon find out for myself.

A word of advice...don't leave yours unattended!